In the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, I've again become the blogging slacker woman! However, some Christmas simplicity set in a few nights ago. Gabrielle was praying before dinner and at the end of her long-winded prayer, took a breath, and then said "And Jesus, thank you for being born and dying on the cross for our sins." Silence followed. Thad and I were a bit stunned at what she had just said, and both of us sort of hung our heads in shame at the innocent perspective she had put on Christmas.
Why is it that adults get so consumed in things that truly don't matter, all year long and especially during the holidays, when kids seem to have it down pat? Does it really matter if you didn't order NEARLY enough Christmas cards this year and had to cut your list short? Does it matter that you have not wrapped any gifts yet and Christmas is a few days away? Does it REALLY matter that we have forgotten to do our Advent calendar about every other day this year. Oh and that our Christmas lights have decided to stop working entirely and we still haven't finished putting our decorations up?
Everywhere I look, everyone seems to have their act together. Their perfectly cleaned and organized homes, their regular "schedules" they follow, their homemade healthy meals prepared, their kiddos who they never seem to lose their tempers with. Everyone that is, but me. I somehow feel like I'm always out of breath, and always playing "catch up." I'm the mommy who forgets my kid's backpack at least once a week, and has to run back and get it. I'm the one who somehow "missed" the December preschool newsletter so realized at the last moment there was going to be a gift exchange. So my perfectionism goes into overdrive during the holidays to try and overcompensate for always feeling like there's "one more thing to accomplish."
I'm not sure if Gabrielle "fully" understood what she was praying about that night. I'm not sure she really knows what "sin" is yet (although when asked, she explains it pretty succinctly). But her prayer touched our hearts deeply because she KNEW that Christmas wasn't about us, or the presents, or the lights, or the treats. It was about Baby Jesus.
Another little precious moment that happened last night at dinner was when it was about time to eat, Corinne said "G" and looked at sissy, bowed her little hands and head, closed her eyes and started whispering. Little Corinne was ready for sissy to pray for the meal! At 23 months old, we thought it was pretty sweet.
This holiday, my biggest prayer and "wish" is simplicity and peace. This includes finding ways to simplify and continue to help those less fortunate. It also includes making time to continually reflect on all the positives we have in our lives, and how truly fortunate we are. I need to fully internalize the fact that I can't control everything, and that God knows what he's doing.
Thanks so much for this perspective! It's so easy to lose touch with what's really important during the holidays. That G and C both already get it in their own ways shows that, even if they may not always have their backpack when they get to school, they really do have all they need.
ReplyDeleteWell said, Kristine! This is so true of me during the holiday season. Between wanting my first graders and my own family to have the best Christmas experiences ever, I go into overdrive in Nov. and don't stop to catch my breath until the new year. We had a similar moment last night (you may have seen it on fb) :) when Holden said a prayer to God about how much he enjoyed Christmas and how, "You have a really great party, God!" Kids put things into perspective, don't they? Also completley related to your Mommy Guilt post. I feel it every single day, whether I am home with them on break or balancing school and home life. I agree that it is the quality of the time you spend together, not specifically the amount.
ReplyDelete